For such a time as this...

Ester 4:14 says "For if you remain silent at this time, relief and deliverance for the Jews will arise from another place, but you and your father's family will perish. And who knows but that you have come to royal position for such a time as this?"

This verse was said Sunday during the worship service, about a situation totally different than mine, but the man speaking was using it to ask people about their future. What does God have in store for you?

I thought about this verse. Ester was in a position to be able to save her people, but it could possibly cost her her life...it is a great story. Her uncles comment to her (vs 14) clearly says, how do you not know if God has only given you this position of royalty so you can do a great work for Him?

I was struck by this comment...How do I not know that God has not taken my precious Caden so that I might do a great work for Him.

Not long ago I met once a week with a wonderful older woman and chatted about life. She had much to say and great wisdom to pass along. One thing she repeated to me often was this: Always ask, in every situation, what is God trying to teach me? I have thought about this allot lately. I wonder, what is God trying to teach me?

I have come up with a few things.

1. I am not as 'in control" as I thought
2. It is OK to grab at the 1st black purse one sees in Target as you are running for the check-out lane trying not to break down
3. It is also perfectly OK to cry like a crazy woman in the Target check-out lane
4. Always carry tissues. LOTS of tissues
5. He will carry me when I cannot walk
6. I can trust Him with...everything, even the death of my baby girl

If God can use me, (the crazy crying woman in the Target check-out lane grasping a, thankfully on sale, black purse) than I will let Him. This has been the hardest season of my life. I do not know what tomorrow looks like, let alone next month. One day I am fine, I laugh all day, the next it is hard to get out of bed and tears stain my face for all to see.

BUT GOD

DO you see the wonder in that small statement. I cannot. But God... He can do all, I need not do anything but trust Him. But God has brought me to this place. He wants me here, in this dry and weary desert place. He has taken my hand and is leading me through it. I cannot see the end, I do not know how long we will be here, but I am with Him. I am OK.

He has brought me here, in the sight of all, for such a time as this.

I do not know what God has in store for me in such a time as this, I, like Moses, only ask one thing of Him; Show me Your glory.