I really wish I didn't feel the need to apologize or explain why my posts are so few and far between...
But they are...
and I do.
Today I will blame my lack of posting, which really is a lack of free time, on Ryder.
That's right... Ryder.
This precious boy.
He is oh-so cute...and he has very recently become quite a handful.
I am not sure what is really going on... I know he is breaking in like 7 teeth, and he was sick awhile back...but he has started waking at VERY early hours, is almost constantly whining or all out screaming if not held,. and to make matters (as if not already bad enough) worse... only sleeping about an hour a day.
And it is wearing me out... Physically, I am super tired, a mess, and probably very strong due to the fact I have been carrying a 30 lb child around everywhere I go.
Mentally, I am spent.
When he does spring back into "regular Ryder" mode... he is now climbing on the chairs and up on the table, diving onto the couch from the ottoman and playing in the toilet.
And as happy as I am to not be holding him... it still doesn't seem like much of an upside.
I have been praying for more sleep... or at least some wisdom on how to tackle this phase...
2 nights ago, or I should say mornings..because it was around 5 am and I had just put Ryder back down, I finally asked God what I was supposed to be learning. I have been thinking on it and have come up with a few things. Since then, when I changed the focus of my prayers from what I wanted God to do to what God wanted from me... things have been slowly improving. I do not know if it is really getting better, or if I have just become less stressed and panicked about how haggard my life seemed. Maybe it is just an acceptance and a peace that comes only from Him. Either way, I am thankful.
For all the EXTRA cuddle time.
For God continuing to teach me and His patience in my overwhelming weakness.
For the extra sleep I got last night when Ryder slept longer then he has in 3 weeks. (!!!!)
He is learning so much. I realized the other day he really can say a few words...and it is adorable. And he and Rigg are starting to play together.
It makes me realize how big he is getting... and how fast it is happening...
and how one day he won't want to hug me in public or sit next to me on the couch and cuddle...
So right now I will try to remember to cherish all the hugs and cuddles and tears I get to kiss away, because time is fleeting,
Hey all,If you do not know us, the first thing you should know is how much we love the Lord our God, and we are striving to live lives worthy of the title, Believer.
The second is we are praying everyday for His return. On that day we will be reunited with our precious baby girl Caden, the treasure of our hearts. Since the death of our daughter we have battled grief, hurt, tears in public, brain surgery and chemo. We have also celebrated new life in the birth of our 2 sons. So come, read, share and enjoy the life God has given us. Although it is not perfect, or even what we had planned it is what He wants for us, so we choose to rejoice.
"Michael said Caden's funeral felt like a wedding. I smile to type that, because in many ways, it was: a celebration of one little bride being united with the Lamb."
our big Rigg
things that make me laugh
I came back into the room from treating myself to a nice, cold diet coke when I saw the Captain playing with Rigg. He was making the stuffed animal dance in the air toward our son and saying in a sing-song voice “Here comes the zebra.” I looked at him and said in the exact same sing-song voice “It’s a giraffe.” To which the Captain, with only the briefest pauses, sing-songed back the reply… “Daddy had brain surgery.“