Tuesday, January 20, 2009


This week has been a bit harder than I first anticipated. And to be completely honest, which I always strive to do, I thought it was going to be pretty hard. The tears are just beneath the surface if someone asks about Caden's birthday and/or how we are doing. I have had people ask what we are going to do...our answer...nothing. Andy and I just think that doing something would be too painful. So, we will try to act as if Saturday were any other Saturday. When, in all reality, it is our daughters would-be 1st birthday and, sadly, we and all of our friends and family are not getting together to celebrate and watch her eat a cupcake and laugh while the icing gets everywhere. You see, I have had the scenario planned out in my head for sometime. She was going to be beautiful and full of laughter.

And though she was those things while she was here, I have to remind myself, she was never meant to see her 1st birthday. God had other plans. For Caden. For Andy and me. For our families. We Know God is using our lives, as well as Caden's life and death in mighty ways. Yet, this week is hard. We miss our baby girl. Passing milestones without celebrating is heart wrenching. And, yet, we know God is good.

In the mist of my suffering, God has brought be a life to celebrate. Not instead of, but in addition to. My dear friend Stacey and her husband are expecting their 2nd child this week. Does anyone else see Gods hand? :) Did I mention it was a baby girl?

I ask 2 things of you this week. Please remember us in your prayers, specifically for this week and Saturday.
And for Stacey, as we all anxiously await the birth of a precious baby girl who, the Author of Life decided long ago, was meant for such a time as this.


Extraordinary Ordinary Life said...

We will be praying. And I always feel as if there is nothing I can do or say, but if you need anything please call me!

Jacie said...

I'll keep praying for you. God will comfort you.
I thought you might like to read these lyrics to one of my favorite songs. They are so inspirational to me. I thought maybe you might enjoy them as well.

"There's always gonna be another mountain.
We're always gonna wanna make it move.
Always gonna be a up-hill battle.
Sometimes were gonna have to lose.
Ain't about how fast I get there.
Ain't about what's waiting on the other side.
Its the climb."

Kay Alderfer said...

Dear semi-stranger,
My name is Kay and I'm a friend of your housemate, Ricardo.
(That's Spanish for Richard... oh I'm so funny.)

So the truth is, I will be in Indy on Friday to celebrate my 20th birthday. We're going swing dancing. I would love to meet you, or have you join us in our disobedience, or even join us for dinner at denny's. Please, come celebrate with us.

Heidi Stone said...

cari, you bring such joy to my life. i still pray for you whenever i think of you.

...and i'm totally glad we share the same sense of llama humor. :)