Monday, March 2, 2009

When the sky falls in

I am writing from the state of New York. That's right, Internet, I am mini-vacationing. I have come here to visit my dear friend Julie and her husband Sherwin. They are SO much fun. I have had a great time here, and am sad to leave. But, alas, I cannot stay forever. I DO have a life back home...really, I do.
Since I have been here, I have discovered much. Firstly, I have weird luck.
Let me explain.
This past Friday, Julie had a work luncheon and had to go in for, oh.... 'bout 2 hours. So being the thoughtful friend that she is, she took me to a local mall to shop( I LOVE TO SHOP) while I waited. It was, as stated previously, around lunch time, so I went to the food court. (side note: this is kinda 2 stories in one)I DO NOT like to eat by myself. Maybe it is because I am such a people person, maybe I just dislike my own company, whichever it is...I still hate it. So,being the thoughtful wife I am, I called Andy. HIS PHONE WAS OFF!!!! OFF!!! Andy never turns his phone off. NEVER. Then I think...Andy is having a problem with his phone, I wonder if he knows...I MUST TELL HIM. So I send him a text message to his work email. 2 min later I get am auto-reply email saying "Andrew Chastain is out of the office Friday Feb. 27th. I will not be back until Monday March 2nd." Um, that is weird. He never told me he was taking off today...What is he doing? So I went to my logical next best bet...the guy who saw Andy last. Richard. So I call up Richard.
Me: hey Richard, where is my husband?
Richard: I have no idea.
Me: I do not believe you. You sound like you are not telling the truth.
Richard: I am being honest I have no idea where Andy is.
Me: Richard, you are not telling me the truth, but I see I am getting nowhere here,so we will talk about this later.
I try to call Andy off
Now being truly alone, and being ticked off at Richard,I finish my lunch....alone, and begin to walk the mall. I walk down one side, go into a few shops. I get to the middle of the mall. Here there is a Starbucks, with couches and chairs all around...filled with people ( this is important)
All of a sudden, I get smacked on the back of my head. HARD. Before I can figure out what happened about 3 people come over and ask if I am OK. I say, Sure, but what happened?

A 6 foot metal bar fell from the ceiling and hit me on the head. Pain, shock, a bump, and plaster down my shirt....ahh the shopping experience.
So I give a report to the security guy... "I am fine. No, really. No I am not bleeding. No I do not want to see a Dr. Yes, I know I am pregnant. No I am not from here. Yes I am refusing medical attention. No. Yes. I AM FINE. thank you"
I then scoop my dignity off the ground and walk away with my newly smashed head held high. As soon as I get around the corner...I call Andy. PHONE OFF!


I call Richard. He picks up, and hangs up. DEATH TO RICHARD! I call again. He picks up, and hangs up. HE WILL PAY!

I call my sister. Ask if she knows where Andy is....Nope. Oh yeah, the mall ceiling fell on my head" Cari, do you think you could have a concussion? I never thought of that... Did I do the right thing turning down the Dr.? Who do I ask....
Andy? UMMM (if you have been following at all) NO!
I think, my mom, (cringe inside, because I know she will flip out and demand I go to the hospital....OK, I will call and be breezy, I will be flippant...SHE IS NOT THERE!!!


So I called Barb. She was there, gave me some good advise, told me Andy would surface at some point. made sure I was OK and let me go (slightly reluctantly) I will have you know I told Barb that Andy was up to something fishy. He is either doing something for me at home, or flying here.
So alone again. I went back to the place of the incident and sat down at the Starbucks to work on my bible study. Barb calls to check on me. I am fine. Andy FINALLY CALLS. He is very rushed and not listening....Finally I say. THE CEILING FELL ON MY HEAD! silence
Andy "what?" I told my story. I let him know I was fine. I asked where he was...
Andy: At a meeting.
What about the auto-reply?

Andy: Well, that is not right.
I think to myself, HE HAS TO SET THE AUTO REPLY HIMSELF! He has told me about it....I KNOW! I LISTEN!!
Andy: I gotta go, love you!
Bye. Where is head hurts....what is he up to.
Julie gets there, I tell her what happened. She sees the ceiling, mouth hanging open, head shaking..."I leave you for 2 hours!" I tell her about Andy. She seems oddly unworried.
Turns out, when we get back to Julie and Sherwin's place...Andy is there. I love the man more that I can say. But the one time I need to reach him....

Richard we will talk when I get home.


Grandma Barb said...

Hmmmm.......... I too knew that Andy was winging his way across the sky to you and was fearful I would give it away! I knew he would be there soon to assess the situation, hence my advice to hang in there, and wait until you heard from him! I was concerned though could only happen to you Cari!

cristidehoff said...

First of all, that was a great story. It was just what I need to read! And the sky is falling thing... anyway, glad you're OK. I am very happy Andy could join you. And by the way, I figured that out as soon as you said he didn't answer the first time!

Richard said...

Yes we will. I'll start looking for another place to live. . .

Amy's Anecdotes said...

Okay that story was hilarious...although Im very glad that you are okay! I thought the twist was going to be that Julie just dropped you off there becuase she planned it with Andy to meet you at Starbucks (and he saw the whole thing)

Lindsey said...

Great story- which I'm sure will stick in your head for a long time to come!:)

Heidi Stone said...

ROFLOL. Only you, Cari. Only you...

Julie said...

I leave you for 2 hours......sigh...