If you find a sleeping dragon

If you find a sleeping dragon, it stands to reason you might want to take a picture.

But, be careful, if you take a picture, you might wake the dragon.

When he realizes you are there, the dragon might do terrible things, like:

Bare his teeth, or

Open his ferocious mouth menacingly.

He might try to smash you with his hammer… (dragons have hammers!)

He could get so angry he starts to drool uncontrollably.

Yet, he might be in the mood for some company, and if you are lucky, He might try on his new hat to see if you like it.

You should probably say you do, because he could give orders for his vicious beast to attack!

But, after a while, the dragon will get sleepy…as all dragons do.

And, if you find a sleeping dragon, it stands to reason you might want to take a picture.

But, be careful, if you take a picture, you might wake the dragon!

 

9

I am supposed to be cleaning my house. You see, we put our house up for sale and we have a showing tonight. And my house is most definitely not showable in its current state.


Yet, here I sit…

I am feeling sentimental today. Maybe it is lack of sleep, maybe it is hormones…maybe it is the fact that I am cleaning my house in order to help it sell, knowing full well that if it does, we will be leaving the only house Caden ever knew… the only house I have memories of her in.

Maybe it is the knowledge that in 9 days’ time she would have turned 2. I have no doubt that she would have been driving me crazy with requests for cake and squealing with delight at all of the undivided attention she would have received…the one thing the girl loved was attention…and squealing.

Some days the pain of a baby girl gone is debilitating, the memory of her is like salt on an open wound… other days her memory is a sweet reminder of Gods goodness and gifts. Most days anymore I can sit and think of her with a smile or a laugh. But, today… today it has me in tears, wishing I could hold her once more. To snuggle her soft baby cheek and kiss her silken baby hair. To hear her squeal like a tea kettle or chatter to herself as she plays.

In 9 days it will be Caden’s birthday. This year it lands on a Sunday. I am going to sing a song at church. I did last year as well. God has been faithful to the Captain and I. He has carried us through and comforted us in ways I could never have imagined. It is my hope to sing a song once a year around Caden’s birthday in honor of my daughter and in testimony of what God has done in our lives.

Please pray that I can hold it together and sing for Him…and honor her.

the straw

As I sit here crying I am reminded that God is good.


God is good.

God is good.

I say this because right now I am feeling overwhelmed, anxious, angry and sad. (I think maybe a bit insane too from feeling all of these emotions at once.)

For the past couple of days I have had this icky feeling...an unsettled, discontent, anxious feeling. I am not sure what it is from. The past week or so has had it's ups and downs...like most weeks at our house...or anyone’s house, for that matter. I have been trying to focus on God and His never changing character...because, even though I feel icky...God is the same God as when I feel happy or content. My emotions are not as important as truth...and God, who never changes is truth.

What ever has me mad and upset is fleeting...although, I do wish it would fleet a bit faster then it is. Today was just the straw that broke the proverbial camels back. At one point this morning I sat and burst into hot angry tears. I told God just how I felt in no uncertain terms. I am sure he listened. I am also sure I sounded a bit like a grouchy 3 year old. As I sat there angry and now a hot mess to boot, I thought...."I need a friend." So I called one.

She was just what I needed. Good for a chuckle, a listen and a good verse.

Psalm 94:19
When my anxious thoughts multiply within me,
Your consolations delight my soul.

She said we have to do nothing for our anxious thoughts to multiply within us...but when we focus on Christ and the consolations He gives...our soul will be delighted.

I shall, indeed, try to change my focus to His consolations. For it is not my situation that needs fixing (which I can do nothing about anyway) but my attitude and focus.

How do you measure up?

I love to measure things, to count things, to contrast and compare and add up… it is true. As you may remember I was a measuring fool about my rapidly protruding mid-section when I was Prego with the Big Rigg. I have often fantasized about having a magical tape measure like the one Mary Poppins has, so you can see how people measure up…Cari Chastain, practically perfect in every way…ahem…I was daydreaming again…sorry.


I love to know how tall/long Rigg is, how much he weighs. I like to know how many calories he has eaten (Rigg, not me…I never count my calories…hello!, like I really want to know that?!)
It is fun to know how many miles it is from one place to another, and how many waffle houses are from milemarker 103 on interstate 65 and Orlando Florida…93, or there was in the spring of 1998.

The idea of things being measurable is nice. We can count and see if we are doing more or less, we can build upon goals, or just add things up for fun…as in the waffle house addition game.

When I was in college I was involved in Navigators. It was so very good for me and my spiritual walk. At the end of each weekly study was an application. What will you do differently in your life because of what you have learned this week? A lot of bible studies have applications, and I think it is one of the best thing about bible studies…I mean what is the point of reading the bible if you are not going to conform or let Christ conform your life to it’s standards….anyway. One thing I learned from that great group called the Navigators is to make your applications measurable.

So if you finished an awe-inspiring study about God and His sovereignty and you put down for your application that you will trust Him more…how do you measure that? So, then our study leader would help us figure out how to make it measure able…so instead of saying that you will trust Him more, you can say I will find a promise in scripture about trusting God and claim that promise in prayer every morning. See the difference. This way you can make sure you are applying your applications. I just LOVE this!

So, now every time I decide on a goal or application from a study, I try to make it measurable. One of my goals this year is to memorize more scripture. I can make this measurable by deciding how many verses I want to memorize week, a month or over the course of the whole year…

Are your goals measurable?

I plan on finishing off some candy today…this is measurable, after they are gone I can count all of the empty wrappers and then burn them to hide all evidence! Ahh…sweet!

victorious!

The gauntlet has been thrown.

A new challenge has been issued.

Mighty and difficult is the road ahead.

But our hero will not waver,

He will not be thwarted.

He will meet the challenge head on...

and he will prevail,

and he shall be victorious!

CR-AZY!

Do you see anything odd about this picture?

The man loves his basketball shorts...even in 7 inches of snow...

Do you think they make thermal basketball shorts? Might be warmer...|:)

Carrots

Carrots

are

messy.

Good thing

I am

kissable washable!

Mr. Independant

   

My little boy

Is getting so big

and becoming so independant

He can now do this!

And he is loving it!

resolved

I never make new year's resolutions. NEVER. Really, it is because I do not want to make one, then fail at it...so if I just never make one, I cannot fail. This has always seemed like a good plan to me.

Most new year's resolutions seem revolve around food...and trying not to eat it, or sweating it off...or resolving to eat only celery stalks for lunch...this is SO not me. I am a lover of all things eatible and have no will power to stay away form such treats. Nor do I intend to.

This year however the Captain and I made a joint resolution that did, in fact, revolve around food. We even shook on it! So now we are in for the long haul. A promise made is a promise kept in the Chastain household...we are people of integrity, a man and woman of our word. Our word is our bond kind of thing. So a resolution we made, and we are resolved to see it through. 

Oh, you want to know what it is...OK.

We were eating out on our "big Christmas date" and got to talking about all the places we have never eaten...(in our city, not the world...that would be quite a long list)...so we decided that it would be a great idea to go one new place to eat every month. So this year we resolved to eat more...so to speak.

So if you know any great places to eat ( for a reasonable price of course) let us know...as I said before...we shook on it, so now we are locked into the deal...being the honerable and upstanding kinda people we are. So we will just have to eat our way through this year... (Ahh, sweeter words have never been uttered!)

Wish us luck!

Trust

Oh my goodness...yesterday I got to have lunch out like a real grown up person. I Know!!! You are just as stunned as I am right?! Andy watched Rigg...because he is off work on vacation (Andy not Rigg) and let me go have a leisurely lunch with my friend Mindy.
It. was. fabulous!
2 whole hours of uninterrupted conversation. We got to finish one…or two. I cannot remember the last time that happened. Again…It. was. fabulous!

I was telling her how hard it was having Rigg sick this past week or so. If I am honest…and I always try to be honest…it was harder having Rigg sick then it was when Andy was in the hospital for his surgery. Sounds a bit off, doesn’t it? I think it is because I knew I had no control what-so-ever over Andy or the outcome of his brain surgery…and with Rigg, I feel like because he is here and I am his mom, I should be able to make it better. That and having to re-live a baby with a fever was no fun. ( Rigg is doing much better now…and because of that, so are his parents…I might even be considered legally sane again in just a few short days!)

When Rigg was his worst…a fever, a nasty cough, that, if let alone, would become hard and deep enough he would gag and then puke…I was a total mess. It was such a struggle for me to give him and his health…his life, to God. To trust God enough to give Rigg over. I wanted to hold on, I wanted that control…and I had no power over his sickness. I was helpless at the wheel, yet still gripping it and refusing to let go and give control to the One who could steer us out of trouble. It seems crazy, after all the Captain and I have been through, to not be able to give it up to God. There were times when I would pray and say God take this worry and fear away, and then 3 seconds later I was having to pray the same thing again. Every second of every day was a battle over my thoughts and emotions. I wanted God to have it…but I kept taking it back. I was so tired. Physically because of lack of sleep, and mentally for the tug-of-war I was playing with God.
I know better…but at times, I would almost try and bargain with Him… I would start a sentence in my head…God, if you just make him better, get him through this, then I… I would what exactly? What are you playing at, Cari?
God is not a God of games and manipulation. He is not standing over me with a wicked smile on His face waiting on me to crack…He wants me to succeed, He wants me to trust Him and rest in Hs character, which, the last time I checked…was all it claims to be. I have never found Him wanting…

I shared all of this with my friend. She shared with me that the was listening to a sermon recently and it brought up a similar thread. Moses asked God to show him His glory. (Ex. 33:18) Which is a huge thing to ask…and in the sermon the lady said, do you now why we do not ask this same thing from God? Because we believe a lie from Satan. We believe that if we ask God to show us and demonstrate His glory in our lives that it will be too much of a risk…it will cost us too much…God will demand more then we can give or want to let go of. Do you see the lie friends? God is a God of goodness, love, compassion, and mercy. He does things for our good. Suffering is a part of this fallen world…but to the Christian, suffering is never wasted. God brings about the good…because that is who He is…He is goodness.

I have been thinking about that conversation all night…I need not wait for the “other shoe to fall”. I need only to rest in God, who I know Him to be. If I trust in God, His name, His character…then I do not need to be afraid.

Isaiah 26:3
You will keep in perfect peace
him whose mind is steadfast,
because he trusts in you.